<![CDATA[LIINA YOGA - Liina\'s Blog]]>

<![CDATA[LIINA YOGA - Liina\'s Blog]]>Thu, 21 May 2026 19:20:21 +0200Weebly<![CDATA[YIN YOGA AND WATER ELEMENT]]>Thu, 11 Jan 2024 16:02:15 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/yin-yoga-and-water-element5 ELEMENT SERIES
WATER - WINTER - KIDNEYS AND URINARY BLADDER

Winter is the energy of the element Water, the time of rest and hibernation, when nature retreats to build up its reserves for its next cycle of seasons. This is a quieter, more reflective time of year, a time to slow down, to allow the stillness to guide you to the places in your body and psyche you may have neglected. During the darkest time of the year, allow the quiet practices to offer you the rest you need to build an inner reservoir and let these practices guide you into deepening your self-knowledge. This is the time for introspection, as all the answers we seek are within us - we just have to be quiet enough to listen and be empty enough to be filled.

We can enter a phase of internal winter at any season. The first sentence in Katherine May's brilliant book Wintering is "Some winters arrive in the sun." Inner winter is a time of deepening our knowing of what is most essential, time of facing our fears and shadows, time of decent and unraveling, time of stillness, of not knowing, of surrender and of mystery.

According to the Daoist tradition, everything in life requires the association of Yin and Yang for balance, which is why the organ meridians form pairs. To put it simply, Yin organs produce, transform, regulate and store vital substances such as Qi, blood, Jing and body fluids. Yang organs deal with impure substances, and their job has to do with elimination and digestion.

In the holistic view of Daoism and Chinese Medicine each organ pair’s Qi has specific functions in our body and is linked to a particular element and an emotion. The pair of Kidney (yin organ) and Urinary bladder (yang organ) correspond to Water element, the season of Winter and the emotion of Fear.

Like water being the foundation of life in nature, so are the Kidneys believed to house our source energy, vitality and longevity. Kidneys are particularly active during winter, which also means that they can be more vulnerable to imbalance and susceptible to cold exposure. Urinary bladder is the Yang organ that supports the Kidneys and serve as a fluid reservoir. In Chinese Medicine view bladder also monitors how we use our resources (time, money, energy) making sure we have enough reserves.

Kidneys are considered like your batteries :-) They store a type of Qi called "Jing" - which can be translated as "vital essence". There is pre-natal Jing which we are born with and inherit from our parents (like our generic constitution). We are born with a certain amount and the regular processes of living, growing, developing, maturing and aging use up Jing. That's just the natural process of aging - part of being alive. But the way we live can "burn up" Jing more slowly or more quickly.
As you might guess, things like unhealthy eating, alcohol, drug use, but also stress and not getting enough sleep are behaviors that use up our vital essence more quickly. I've been thinking about this a lot - in connection to burnout, chronic stress and overworking as these dip into the Jing storage for sure!
Whereas activities like - slowing down and prioritizing rest, meditation, eating healthy, activities that uplift and "light you up", and yin yoga (I'm sure) help to conserve Jing.

In Chinese Medicine view, each organ also houses a spirit.  Zhi is the spirit housed in Kidneys. It is translated as willpower. On a superficial level (Yang will), Zhi is responsible for self-determination, will power, ability to achieve our goals. But on a deeper level (Yin will) it stands for our capacity to surrender our individual will to align one's life with Tao. "Will that cannot be willed" - "Yin will is mostly a direction, a willfulness that moves to an end that cannot be know until it is already reached... It is the wisdom that cannot be obtained, but is accumulated ... it possesses a deep trust in that the unknown eventually reveals an inevitable destiny (Ted Kaptchuk).

I want to share a passage from a book Five Spirits by Lorie Eve Dechar. She talks about Taoist alchemists' discoveries around preserving Jing:
"They discovered that they could actually use entropy, the energies of gravity, matter and the yin - the energies of stillness, receptivity and surrender - as a way to gain rather than deplete energy value. The secret of this alchemical reversal was to surrender the natural strivings of the will and to align one's life and one's actions with Tao. ...they could gain potency by going with the tide of natural flow rather than trying to impose their individual will on the world around them.
Taoist sages saw that, paradoxically, the more they followed the way of the receptive yin, the more they surrendered the potent yang striving of their will to the infinitely more potent will of Tao, the more vitality, spontaneity, compassion and joy they attained. As they surrendered their limited personal will to the greater will of the divine, their capacity to do, to be, to illuminate and to manifest increased rather than decreased as they aged. In the life of the sage, energy value increased as will transformed to an even more potent substance called wisdom."

EMBODIMENT OF WATER ELEMENT through
the sinew and primary channels of Chinese medicine

Just like Qi can be thought of as the organizational force of the body, meridians can be seen as the network of channels or a “conduit” (term by P. Unschuld) through which that organizing force moves, like channels of communication along which subtle information flows. According to this view, as long as Qi flows freely through the channels and the internal organs work in harmony, the body remains healthy.

Largely like the concept of Qi, the meridian theory was dismissed by western science until quite recently, when the connective tissue (fascia) research began to reveal similarities and overlap between myofascial pathways and Chinese meridian maps. There are a lot of things Western science still cannot “prove” or understand about the inner workings of Chinese Medicine, but the wide-held belief is that the anatomical basis of acupoints and meridians is the fascial network distributed throughout the body.

The meridian system consists of larger and smaller channels, currents that are closer to the surface of the body, and pathways that run deep and internal connecting the exterior to the interior each serving somewhat different functions. My current view is that in Yin yoga poses we mainly affect the sinew channels. Yet, of course, everything in the body is connected, so the Sinew Channels have connections with other channels and to the Jing Luo network (this is the Chinese name for what often gets translated as meridians, Jing means to go through, a thread in the fabric and Luo something that connects or attaches, a net.)

When connecting to an element and discovering how to move with that element, it can be beneficial to map and trace the channel pathways, and then try to sense them during the practice. It also can help to uncover which poses or movements to bring into your practice.

KIDNEY AND URINARY BLADDER CHANNELS

KIDNEY MERIDIAN CHANNEL - (primary channel),
accessed primarily via acupuncture and acupressure points

KIDNEY SINEW CHANNEL - a more superficial channel, this is what we can access easily with Yin yoga shapes and somatic movements

URINARY BLADDER MERIDIAN CHANNEL - (primary channel), accessed primarily via acupuncture and acupressure points

URINARY BLADDER SINEW CHANNEL - a more superficial channel, this is what we can access easily with Yin yoga shapes and somatic movements

FASCIA ANATOMY
where ancient wisdom meets modern understanding of the body

Compare the pathway of the Superficial backline from modern fascia anatomy with the Urinary bladder sinew channel of Chinese Medicine:

SOME YIN POSES THAT TARGET KIDNEY
AND URINARY BLADDER CHANNELS

A SAMPLE SEQUENCE FOR WATER ELEMENT

WATER ELEMENT YIN PRACTICES ON DEMAND

SEASONAL RETREATS

YIN AND FASCIA TEACHER TRAINING

]]><![CDATA[YIN YOGA AND METAL ELEMENT]]>Wed, 15 Nov 2023 09:31:06 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/yin-yoga-and-metal-element5 ELEMENT SERIES
METAL ELEMENT - AUTUMN - LUNGS & LARGE INTESTINE

Metal phase externally is related to the season of Autumn - phase that initiates descent, ending of cycles and letting go, decay and composting, an impulse to harvest, gather and preserve.
Within our bodies, Metal element is related to the organs of Lungs and Large intestine - the receiving of what is pure/essential and the letting go of waste/excess.
The emotion of Metal is Grief - teaching the inevitability of loss and to discern what is essential and precious.
The spirit of Metal element housed in Lungs is called Po - the "soul of the body" or flip it around "the material aspect of the soul"- it stands for our embodied knowing, our "animal wit", instinctual and unconscious drives.

I love to use the Chinese Medicine 5 phase wheel as an inspiration for moving with the season. Ancient Taoist alchemists based an entire philosophy and healing system on observing these cycles of change in nature. Each element and season brings forth its own alchemy, offering its gifts but also carrying its shadows. Like a mandala, this cyclical map is both - an expression of unity and diversity, wholeness and interconnection.

The 5 elements are alive both around us and in us;
they describe the movement of all life and all energy and
embody all the qualities we encounter in Nature.
Through understanding the five Elements
we may begin to understand both Nature and ourselves" J.R. Worsley

We are cyclical beings, but there are way more cycles than just the seasons. Our energy waxes and wanes with the moon and within one day, we go through shorter or longer phases in our life that carry an energy that resembles one of the seasons more than others. There is so much to learn from nature and that is what I always aim to do when offering a series based on the 5 elements.

Below are listed some Metal element themes that we can draw inspiration on for self-reflection (or as themes for you Yin classes if you are a teacher):

Structure, routine, ritual, boundaries, clarity, being methodical, organized, precision, discipline
Value, self-worth/self-esteem, worthiness, integrity, clarifying what is essential and of value (in ourselves, in our lives, in life in general)

Discernment, distilling (of wisdom), condensing, cutting through
Contraction, interoception, gathering, descent, decline, slowing down
Consolidation of experiences/ observing / reflecting. Looking back at ones experiences and reflecting on what have you learned / what is the wisdom / what is coming IN
Letting go / composting / decay / death / endings / entropy / downward pull / breaking apart/ breaking down / disintegrating / shedding. Letting of of excess/clutter
Lungs (the Yin organ of Metal element) is often called the seat of Wisdom symbolising the hidden treasure at the heart of hardship, learning from our past experiences, being able to see through bs
Embodied knowing - wisdom connected to the body (the spirit housed in Lungs called Po)
Coming and going of life, impermanence, preciousness of life: Metal spirit PO not only relates to the underworld, death and disintegration, but also to renewal, replenishment and resurrection.
Spirit housed in Lungs called PO - animal wit, embodied knowing, sensation and appreciation, “soul of the body”/”material aspect of the soul”, the "animal body's" instinctual and unconscious drives (that which is beyond our conscious awareness). In some modern interpretations Po is thought to relate to our autonomic nervous system, “the aspect of our unconscious that speaks to us through our desire obsessions, psychosomatic symptoms and the wordless stories of our bodies.”

LONGER TALK ON METAL ELEMENT & YIN YOGA

EMBODIMENT OF METAL ELEMENT through
the sinew and primary channels of Chinese medicine

Most people are familiar with the Chinese Medicine acupuncture maps, but there are many more channels that run through the body forming a connected network all the way from the surface of the body to the deep interior of the body and to the organs. Below you can see the pathways of the sinew channels (also called muscle-tendon channels) that run more superficially in the body. In Chinese these channels are called Jin Jing where Jin translates to sinews meaning tendons, muscle, ligaments and fibrous tissue and Jing means to go through, a thread in a fabric. These are broader longitudinal bands of muscles, tendons, ligaments and fascia that wrap (or "knot" as they refer to it in TCM) at the big joints of the body (hip, knee, ankle, shoulder, elbow and wrist and also occiput and face).

As you can see, the Sinew Channels and the Primary Channels (popularly called "meridians") run along very similar pathways, it is believed that in our Yin practice we are primarily targeting and affecting the Sinew Channels. Yet, of course, everything in the body is connected, so the Sinew Channels have connections with other channels and to the Jing Luo network (this is the Chinese name for what often gets translated as meridians, JING as I mentioned above means to go through, a thread in the fabric and Luo something that connects or attaches, a net.

When connecting to an element and discovering how to move with that element, it cab be beneficial to map and trace the channel pathways, and then try to sense them during the practice. It also can help to uncover which poses or movements to bring into your practice.

LUNG AND LARGE INTESTINE CHANNELS

The talk above introduces the channels in more depth, but just as a quick overview to help you with feeling and embodying the Metal element channels in the body, here are some visuals:

LUNG MERIDIAN CHANNEL - (primary channel),
accessed primarily via acupuncture and acupressure points

LUNG SINEW CHANNEL - a more superficial channel, this is what we can access easily with Yin yoga shapes and somatic movements

LARGE INTESTINE MERIDIAN CHANNEL - (primary channel) accessed primarily via acupuncture and acupressure points

LARGE INTESTINE SINEW CHANNEL - a more superficial channel, this is what we can access easily with Yin yoga shapes and somatic movements

FASCIA ANATOMY
where ancient wisdom meets modern understanding of the body

Largely, like the concept of Qi, the meridian theory was dismissed by Western science until quite recently, when the fascia research began to reveal similarities and overlaps between myofascial pathways and Chinese meridian maps. There are a lot of things Western science still cannot “prove” or understand about the inner workings of Chinese Medicine, but the wide-held belief is that the anatomical basis of acupoints and meridians is the fascial network distributed throughout the body.

By one of the definitions fascia is an uninterrupted viscoelastic tissue, which forms a functional 3-dimensional collagen matrix that surrounds and connects every muscle and organ, forming continuity throughout the body. Fascia surrounds and penetrates all structures of the body, extending from head to toe. This description is very similar to how energy channels are described in Chinese Medicine.

MYOFASCIAL LINES:
DEEP FRONT ARM LINE & SUPERFICIAL FRONT ARM LINE

Check the correlation in the pathways of the modern myofascial lines and the Chinese Medicine sinew channels.

Connective tissue consists of collagen and water which are both good at conducting electrical signals, and studies have shown that acupuncture points and channels conduct electricity better than the surrounding tissues. (Daniel Keown, ‘The Spark in the Machine’). Movement and stress can create tiny electrical currents and magnetic fields in the body (through a process called piezoelectricity), therefore the mechanical forces transmitted through the meridian system ultimately reach into the matrix of the cell, where they produce biochemical and transcriptional changes (Jimi Wollumbin).
(excerpt from our Yin and Fascia Teacher Training manual)

UPPER BODY YIN POSES
that will target the Lung and Large intestine channels

SAMPLE YIN SEQUENCE FOR UPPER BODY

Even though the description on the image says poses for HEART channel, they all also work for Lung and Metal element. With Yin poses it is impossible to be super precise as the stretches will always stimulate a larger area. How we can bring in more precision is the way we pay attention, how we move our awareness and with our intention.

For more in-depth study of Yin yoga, the fascia anatomy approach and how to combine Chinese Medicine approach to the practice, either check out my OnDemand Library, Livestreams, become my Patron on Patreon.com or my annual Yin Yoga and Fascia Teacher Training

METAL ELEMENT/AUTUMN THEMED CLASSES IN ONDEMAND LIBRARY

SEASONAL RETREATS

YIN AND FASCIA TEACHER TRAINING

]]><![CDATA[Earth element and Yin yoga]]>Fri, 08 Sep 2023 13:11:46 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/earth-element-yin-yoga

EARTH element key words through the lens of Chinese Medicine are body, matter, gravity, balance, steadiness, substance, support, nurturing, being grounded, maturity, density, abundance... In Chinese medicine Earth represents the season of Late Summer and transition times between seasons, in our bodies it corresponds to Spleen and Stomach meridian channels and is linked not only to our body's ability to digest food but our overall capacity to be nourished by life, ability to think clearly, metabolise our past experiences.

I love using Chinese Medicine 5 phase wheel as an inspiration for moving with the season. Ancient Taoist alchemists based an entire philosophy and healing system on observing these cycles of change in nature. Each element and season brings forth its own alchemy, offering its gifts but also carrying its shadows. Like a mandala, this cyclical map is both - an expression of unity and diversity, wholeness and interconnection.

We are cyclical beings, but there are way more cycles than just the seasons. Our energy waxes and wanes with the moon, we go through shorter or longer phases in our life that carry an energy that resembles one of the seasons more than others. There is so much to learn from nature and that is what I always aim to do when offering a series based on the 5 elements.

EARTH element is so rich in symbolism. In Chinese medicine, Earth is considered the prime stabilising force, it provides continuity, balance, stability, it sustains, nurtures and nourishes: on social level it correlates to being connected, our ability to take care of ourselves and others, it stands for our ability to trust - ourselves, others and life. There is so much to experiment with when we start to embody some of these qualities in practice.

In Chinese medicine Earth element in the body is represented by the functions of Spleen and Stomach, related to our metabolism, digestion on physical level and to our ability to take in assimilate and "digest" information coming in through our senses on a mental level.

The spirit (Shen) housed in Spleen is called Yi and is often translated as intellect and represents clear thought and intention. It stands for our ability to make sense of our experiences, organize our thoughts and feelings. The Chinese character for Yi (the spirit of Earth) can be translated as "Heart's song", therefore Earth element is about embodiment and brining spirit into matter, bringing our visions, intentions and dreams into the material world, following through with our plans and showing up in our lives.

Imbalance in Earth element shows up as anxiety, worry, overthinking, rumination, nervousness, mistrust, low self-esteem. Balanced Earth leaves us grounded, supportive, caring, able to trust, confident, compassionate and empathetic.

EARTH ELEMENT THEMES

Lessons of Earth phase

Centeredness – Returning home to yourself, internal stability
Strength, Stability, Steadiness - Earth offers stability and is nourished by stability
Constancy & Routine – The power of repletion and transformation through small, steady steps aligned with the heart’s truth.
Assimilation, Integration & Transformation – Digesting food, emotions, sensory input, and life experiences.
Nourishment – Being supported from within, connect with what truly sustains you, cultivating the ability to give as well as to receive.
Trust – In yourself, others, and the unfolding of life.
Harvest & Fruition – Taking time to bask in and appreciate what you have created, .
Equanimity – Meeting change with steadiness, holding of oppositional forces,
Spiralling vs. Knotted Energy – The Spleen energy’s spiralling motion around the center supports digestion and transformation which leads to clear intentions and skilful actions; knotted (blocked) energy leads to worry, rumination, stagnation, procrastination and lack of follow-up actions.

If you are a teacher, these topics can be an inspiration for your class themes!

EARTH ELEMENT EMBODIMENT VIA THE ENERGY CHANNELS

Most people are familiar with the Chinese Medicine acupuncture maps, but there are many more channels that run through the body, connecting all the way from the surface of the body to the deep interior of the body and to the organs. Below you can see the pathways of the sinew channels (also called muscle-tendon channels) that run more superficially in the body. In Chinese these channels are called Jin Jing where Jin translates to sinews meaning tendons, muscle, ligaments and fibrous tissue. These are broader longitudinal bands of muscles, tendons, ligaments and fascia that wrap (or "knot" as they refer to it in TCM) at the big joints of the body (hip, knee, ankle, shoulder, elbow and wrist and also occiput and face).

As you can see, the Sinew Channels and the primary channels (popularly called "meridians") run along very similar pathways, it is believed that in our Yin practice we are primarily targeting and affecting the Sinew Channels. Yet, of course, everything in the body is connected, so the Sinew Channels have connections with other channels and to the Jing Luo network (this is the Chinese name for meridians or what I have called the primary channels in my text above and below).

When connecting to an element and discovering how to move with that element, it can be beneficial to map and trace the channel pathways, and then try to sense them during the practice. It also can help to uncover which poses or movements to bring into your practice.

SPLEEN SINEW CHANNEL
(runs more superficially, this is what we can
access easily in Yin shapes and with somatic movements)

SPLEEN PRIMARY CHANNEL
(accessed primarily via acu-points
using acupressure and acupuncture)

STOMACH SINEW CHANNEL

STOMACH PRIMARY CHANNEL

FASCIA ANATOMY
where ancient wisdom meets modern understanding of the body

Largely like the concept of Qi, the meridian theory was dismissed by Western science until quite recently, when the fascia research began to reveal similarities and overlaps between myofascial pathways and Chinese meridian maps. There are a lot of things Western science still cannot “prove” or understand about the inner workings of Chinese Medicine, but the wide-held belief is that the anatomical basis of acupoints and meridians is the fascial network distributed throughout the body.

Check the correlation between the pathway of the Stomach sinew channel (as per Chinese medicine maps) and Superficial frontline (as per fascia anatomy).

By one of the definitions fascia is an uninterrupted viscoelastic tissue, which forms a functional 3-dimensional collagen matrix that surrounds and connects every muscle and organ, forming continuity throughout the body. Fascia surrounds and penetrates all structures of the body, extending from head to toe. This description is very similar to how energy channels are described in Chinese Medicine.
Connective tissue consists of collagen and water which are both good at conducting electrical signals, and studies have shown that acupuncture points and channels conduct electricity better than the surrounding tissues. (Daniel Keown, ‘The Spark in the Machine’). Movement and stress can create tiny electrical currents and magnetic fields in the body (through a process called piezoelectricity), therefore the mechanical forces transmitted through the meridian system ultimately reach into the matrix of the cell, where they produce biochemical and transcriptional changes (Jimi Wollumbin).
(excerpt from our Yin and Fascia Teacher Training manual)

Helene Langevin, PhD, a research scientist working at the University of Vermont has done research that suggests an overlap between the fascia and the Chinese channel maps. She and her colleagues noticed that the insertions and attachments of the muscles and fascia create lines of pull that are like the grain in wood or warp and weft of a rug. They effectively demonstrated that many acu-points lie directly over areas where there is a fascial cleavage – where sheets of fascia diverge to separate, surround and support muscle bundles.

SAMPLE SEQUENCE
FRONT-BODY YIN
SPLEEN & STOMACH MERIDIANS

LIINA YOGA PRACTICE LIBRARY for more seasonal Yin

Yin yoga and fascia Teacher training

]]><![CDATA[URBAN SPORTS CLUB - why I'm opting out ...]]>Tue, 31 Mar 2020 11:15:00 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/urban-sports-club-why-im-opting-out

This sharing is mostly for Urban Sports Club (USC) members - as I explain my reasons for stopping cooperation with them. However, I believe what I share here does have wider implications on what these times are asking from us, so it might be an interesting read regardless of your knowledge of or status with USC.

In short (for those who don't know USC) Urban Sports Club is a platform - a piece of software - where by becoming a member you pay a monthly fee that grants you access to a large variety of fitness related activities across town. For a user, it sounds pretty amazing, doesn't it? I totally agree! This is NOT the point I would ever argue, I totally support wider access to a variety of movement and health related modalities and teachers. What we - your yoga teachers - want to spread awareness of, is the effect USC has had on our profession and on the yoga scene in Berlin.

This piece is not written to shame or chasten USC-members or teacher/studios choosing to continue working with USC. It is simply to give you enough information and background story, so you can make a more informed decision whether you continue with them or not.
This is simply my own view, story and decision!

BIG PICTURE

I want to zoom (pun intended) out for a moment and look at this issue in the context of the time we are living in - unprecedented, full of uncertainty, we are off our autopilots, our patterns and habits interrupted, more collectively united in our predicament than ever before.

On first glance this issue of ours with USC seems like a storm in a tea-class - tiny and irrelevant when viewed in comparison to the bigger crisis of Corona. Yet, if we are open to shift our perspective from only seeing the horror of the virus and become willing to explore some of the inherent messages it brings, you will realize how all these seemingly small life decision begin to shape what our new "normal" will look like. I hear people say this all the time: "when things are normal again", "when normal life is restored" - and I wince. I'm no prophet. Anyone who says they know what will come of all this, is full of shit. No-one knows! But what I know for sure for myself is I am not at all excited or hopeful to return to the same-old-same-old. The mindless consumption, busyness as a way of making meaning, productivity as the measure of success and companies like USC, Amazon, Spotify, Uber - consolidating middlemen - making better value for customers (and mega profits for their investors) at a huge expense to the people actually doing the work. The rampant consumer capitalism at the expense of the beauty and diversity of the natural world and true richness of our own souls ... I'm not so keen to simply "hit play" after this collective "pause" and get on with our gallop towards the extinction of the human race.

I have been feeling and hoping for a shift for some time now. When the massive fires engulfed Australia as we entered 2020, I thought to myself "this is it". I was expecting some natural disaster(s) soon after to hit Europe. I have not been overly hopeful about the odds for humanity to change their habits quickly and significantly enough to alter our course away from an ecological suicide.

And then Corona happened. I do not want to diminish or belittle the horror and grief that comes with it in any way. One of the teachers I have been following for over a decade - Adyashanti - often talks about building our capacity to "hold the opposites". The closer we get to the truth, the bigger the paradox. A mature spiritual perspective is able to hold the opposites without making one more significant, better or right than the other. This virus brings pain and loss, triggers our individual and collective fears around uncertainty, scarcity, lack and money. Each of us faced with ourselves in this vacuum and liminal space in-between - here lies the hidden gift of Corona. An opportunity for a deeper exploration of our "personal interior" (term by Thomas Hübl) our lives, values, choices, fears, programming and shadows. This is the yin calling (haven't you heard me say this in class hundreds of times!). The other half of the cycle - calling us to slow our rhythms, a time of disintegration, death, letting go of what is not essential, meeting the darkness within. A healthy wholesome integrated yang that is in service of the collective good, can only rise out of this deepened connection, reflection and pause.

On a macro level, the Earth is taking some deep breaths right now - the reduction of human created pollution is visible from space. This gives me hope! This excites me! This is why I want to keep teaching, as I believe our embodied practices have been preparing us for exactly this. Resilience is the capacity of our nervous system to stay present and calm in the eye of the storm, to discern what is fear, compulsion, self-abandonment while allowing for vulnerability and uncertainty and guiding our one next step towards choosing what really matters, fulfills, serves and restores us back to an interconnected relationship with life.

Yet, hopefulness and positive thinking alone are not enough to usher in the longed-for new world. Genuine personal change combined with wise and efficient social action is essential.
...The time has come when we are no longer able to disown any part of ourselves,
our species, or our planet. We are one being. To preserve this grand vision in all our actions is the formidable challenge before us today. (Georg Feuerstein written in 1992).

LETS LOOP IT BACK TO USC

To put it short and simple, the reason why I am opting out from collaborating with USC is that I view their actions and policies unfair, unethical and damaging to the overall yoga scene in Berlin.

I cannot stay true to my values and continue working with USC. It is as simple as that! Especially in this field I am operating in - yoga, mindfulness, increasing awareness - if I keep my mouth shut and won't stand up to an unhealthy power dynamic and monopoly that USC is brining to the yoga scene, how can I keep believing that a bigger shift towards human evolution and greater fairness is possible? Grass-roots, awake, yin-based leadership is what is needed right now - you and me aligning our actions with what are our non-negotiables. Respect, fairness, inclusivity, being in service of a collective are some of mine. What are yours?

I am scared to do this - don't get me wrong. This is my food, my rent, my means to keep teaching and learning. But I feel this seemingly small choice stands for something so much bigger. This is me showing solidarity to my community, this is my commitment to be part of creating a future that differs from what we used to call "normal".

Forget about USC for a moment and think BIG - what would you like the "new normal" to look like? And then as importantly - what are you consequently doing/choosing to usher it forth?

Nothing is ever purely evil or purely good. In order for me to be completely transparent with you, I have to also say that I have benefitted from USC over the years. Many of you probably have found my classes via USC. I consider myself lucky as I already had a stable following before USC entered the scene. Plus the spaces where I teach are big, so the loss I had by lower USC rate was compensated by having more people joining the class. I am not great at self-promotion, so via USC I most likely got more exposure than I ever could have managed through my own means. And I am grateful for that. Yet the classes began to loose their intimacy and community feel, the lines behind studio doors like night-clubs where people had to come half an hour early to get a spot, many regulars stopped coming because it was getting too crowded ... the hype was on. Yoga had become a product to consume - following the consumer capitalist path of "consume as much as possible by paying as little as possible"!

And then Corona hit ...
Having already established monopoly, USC was free to dictate terms to continue profiting from a crisis on the backs of others. A fact from USC's on Linkedin profile - their growth in the last 4 years has been a staggering 5840%. WHAT?!? In the context of health and ecology, things that grow at an unnatural rate like that are considered parasitic or cancerous ("How to Do Nothing: Resisting the Attention Economy» by Jenny Odell). This growth is earned on the backs of studios and independent teachers not receiving a fair pay for their work. Period!
We have lived for so long in a culture that worships growth over fairness and sustainability. We can change this! In this big collective pause, we can clearly see who are the people, organizations, companies that rise up to support and who are pushing only for their own self-interest.

SOME DETAILS TO PONDER OVER ...

Beginning of this year I started to pay VAT and USC refused to add that 19% on top of my already quite low rate - so my income fell 19%.

At the end of last week, the majority (but not all) teachers collaborating with USC got a bulk-email, notifying us about the new rates for our online classes which were a joke and a slap in the face. There were no negotiations, I had a phone conversation with my representative there just a few days before and there was no mention of this. There is now a maximum limit on how much they pay teachers per class per month (regardless how many people join).

The points below were originally drafted by my colleague and friend Valerie Hartwich. I've added my own edits. Once more .. this is not about shaming or chastening USC-members in any way, but simply to give you enough information and background story, so you can make a more informed decision whether you continue with them or not.

We understand and welcome people’s desire to have a diverse and more generous range of practices, as this can be very healthy and can create a system of referral between studios/teachers.
Use your USC membership as a temporary tool to explore Berlin’s yoga world and when you’ve found your favourite studio/teachers consider supporting them directly. Our individual choices can make a difference in shaping a responsible living.
It is a fact that both studios and independent teachers can’t work without USC anymore. It is a fact that today USC is a monopoly dictating terms and prices. Teachers individually have little bargaining power, collectively we might have a chance, with your support change is possible!
Did you know that USC is not transparent about how much they pay teachers/studios, and why there are such stark differences, ranging from 5€ to 10€ for an M member for example. USC can unilaterally change the rate of pay at any point and the contract with them specifically states that partners should not be involved in bad publicity of USC, despite unfair and unequal dynamics.
Teachers and studios are increasingly reliant on it because people are getting used to a one off low price for a vast and generous amount of movement and sports options
The low pay means that teachers and studios have to aim to fill up their classes, leading to packed environments and lesser attention given to individual students.
In most cases the rate paid per student by USC is vastly below the drop-in price most studios or teachers need to make a living.
As a user, did you realize that the money paid to teachers/studios covers a lot more than just the actual class. It has to cover all the other costs/work required to run a class, as well as all the education/trainings necessary to teach safely and skillfully
How do you feel about paying 60 to 100€ for a pair of leggings, yet knowing your independent teacher gets paid 6€ for a class by USC?
In many cases individual teachers are happy to find solutions with students if money becomes an accessibility problem.
Know that teachers are uniting, not only complaining. We are actively in collaboration with each other and wish to offer you a healthier, more sustainable alternative to USC. But this will take time and won't happen overnight. Until then you can still choose what your euros support.

Thank you for reading!

Just that you know - I am no bad-ass revolutionary. I had to write this ... whatever the outcome. I listened to a podcast with Stephen Jenkinson recently where he speaks about what it means to be a "deeply claimed person" and how to stay faithful to what you are born into. In the same podcast he describes how a generation becomes a generation due to the claims the times they are living in make on them, and whether they undertake the spiritual work asked of them or not ... This has stayed with me deeply! These questions - what are these times asking of our generation? Am I faithful to what wants to move through me? How about you...

]]><![CDATA[SEASONAL YIN YOGA - SPRING EDITION]]>Mon, 27 Mar 2017 11:21:40 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/spring-yin

After a winter rest, the power of springtime surges through nature - and through us. Spring is an expression of life at its strongest. In spring, those aspects of us that have been dormant over the winter months begin to awaken. Just as nature enters a cycle of renewal, growth and expansion—so does the energy within us. In traditional Chinese medicine, WOOD is the energy of spring and the Wood element represents the liver and the gall bladder. This is the season to plant seeds for a future harvest, to look ahead and make new plans, formulate new ideas, make decisions, and determine our direction for the coming year - and to take action. Here is a closer look into the Chinese wisdom around this season and what it represents and asks of us, the qualities that harmony in Wood element brings forth and some Yin sequences to balance and support the functioning of Liver and Gallbladder.

SOME THEORY

The early Chinese referred to the twelve organs and their functions as “Officials.” The kingdom would be the body, mind and spirit inside which each official has its own function - physically, mentally and spiritually for the benefit of all.
Liver and Gallbladder work as a tandem. Liver being the yin organ (Zang) is considered more important as the yin organs carry/store special substance like Qi and/or blood, and also houses a spiritual essence and gallbladder the yang organ (Fu) which usually supports the yin organ and deals with waste product - though Gallbadder is an exception (and is therefore called a "bizarre" organ) it's physical function being to produce bile and help metabolize fats.

Why talk about organs when stretching the body in Yin poses? This is the more subtle layer of your practice. When on a physical level we feel the stretching of the tissues, we know that Yin yoga affects the connective tissues of the body and helps to maintain and increase healthy range of motion in our joints. But these long-held asanas also start to have an energetic effect on the body, increasing the flow of Qi (Prana) in meridians (nadis).
This mystical energy flowing within us is referred to by different names in different traditions: Chinese/Taosist name Qi (Chi), India / yogic / tantric Prana or Shakti, Native Americans call it Great Spirit, Christian mystics Holy Spirit and finally in modern science the electromagnetic field of the body is termed bioenergy. The energy moves through these channels in the body, when one channel becomes blocked, the energy being transported through it is stopped and Qi grows stagnant which will effect the overall functioning of the whole body-mind-spirit continuum.

Mind you - yin postures will not be as exact as lets say acupuncture is, in a posture we will be stretching and stimulating a broader area and most likely affecting several meridian lines at a time. In order for the practice to be more specific requires our ability to feel the more subtle aspects of the body and ability to work with our intention and attention.

Click on he links for a great aid to visualize where you LIVER and GALLBLADDER meridians are running in your body. Below are listed some of their functions:

LIVER

Ensures the smooth flow of Qi - called "General of the Army" having the general strategic plan and regulating the movement of Qi to other organs.
Stores, cleanses/filters, distributes blood (when we rest blood from our muscles and organs flows to liver for cleansing)
Oversees the health of ligaments and tendons ensuring fluidity of movement and flexibility
The spiritual aspect stored in Liver is the called Hun. This is translated as the Heavenly soul or Ethereal soul. It is the aspect of the person that goes on 'to the next life', that which remains after death. This is the essence of the sense of renewal and rebirth which the Wood provides, the sense of the transformation of life into the next phase.

GALLBLADDER

Produces and stores bile to metabolize fats
Gallbladder's function is to make decisions, evaluate and provide wise judgement. The Gallbladder makes decisions for every Official. It organizes, coordinates, and carries out into expression the plan of operation of every Official, every plan we make, and every goal, however small, to which we aspire. From the minutest decisions and choices, even those that are made unconsciously, to our highest conscious aspirations. Whether it is digestion, circulation, respiration, intercellular exchanges, or any other bodily function, everything follows a design – a plan for operation (the Liver function) and has a means for carrying it out (the Gall Bladder function).

The element associated with liver is WOOD - the function of wood is movement, expansion, activity, change, it is the home of new ideas, new thoughts, transformation and hope. The Wood is what provides us with the sense of renewal, reawakening and rebirth. The Wood provides the propulsion to change and move forward providing us the vision and foresight It gives us the connection to the future and allows us to plan and design in all areas of our lives. It allows us to express our true nature and manifest ourselves in the world. The Wood/liver gives us the sense of flexibility, ability to change and adapt.
Wood is about growth and balance. The image in nature is the tree which grows with roots solidly planted in the earth and trunk and branches organized into an effective structure. The Wood is split with the roots unseen (yin) and the trunk and the branches reaching towards Heaven (yang).

The emotion associated with the Liver & Gallbladder (and Wood element) is anger and frustration. This can be understood by the blocking of the movement forward - when there is obstruction to any movement, the outcome is frustration and anger. The Wood element / Liver Qi is balanced it allows us to feel and express and eventually transform anger appropriately. Liver is in charge of balancing the emotions - there is an evenness, a sense of balance and appropriate expression of all emotions. The response to challenges is even handed and shows confidence and purposefulness. There is a sense of control, even in the most challenging situations. There is a great deal of confidence and an innate sense of authority. The virtues of harmonious Liver QI are kindness, generosity, tolerance and forgiveness.

The Wood is associated with the Spring, a time of renewal and new growth. The Wood provides the power for movement especially upward toward the Fire, the sun. The movement is also outward away from the center to expand like the branches of a tree. This is the season to plant seeds for a future harvest, to look ahead and make new plans, formulate new ideas, make decisions and determine our direction for the coming year - and to take action.

SOME YIN YOGA PRACTICES

In a yin practice a liver+gallbladder (wood) session can bring up some agitation, even be upsetting and unsettling ... but can also stimulate action. As mentioned above healthy liver Qi is related to our capacity to make plans and put them into action. It is about flexibility, vision and ability to change and adapt.

Below you will find some sequences which support your body especially during spring time to restore balance, detox the organ systems, nourish the digestive system, release tension and stress from spine and hips, and "deep-clean" the energy channels.

Obviously these sequences are not limited to spring. They could become handy when there are changes occurring in life, lack of clarity or vision/direction, times when action is needed! Use your yoga to balance your emotional state, soothe resentment and reactivity in order to see more clearly what is actually going on and what is the wisest way to respond.

If you are new to a Yin style of practice, be sure to read the main YIN PRINCIPLES below.
Also before trying out the sequences, you can do this GUIDED ONLINE CLASS for kidney and liver.

never go to your maximum depth when entering a posture - pause when you feel first signs of resistance in the body
keep softening and relaxing the outer muscles of the body
remain still and patient and observant

I have written more about yin yoga here and more about the use of props here.

SPRING YIN SEQUENCES

Click on the image to get a details description of all the poses with variations.
Click on download to get a PDF of the sequence card.
ENJOY!

BEGINNER FRIENDLY LIVER YIN

beginner liver
File Size:	4160 kb
File Type:	pdf

Download File

YIN YOGA WITH GALLBLADDER FOCUS

gallbladder focus
File Size:	3455 kb
File Type:	pdf

Download File

YIN DETOX

spring yin detox
File Size:	3513 kb
File Type:	pdf

Download File

YIN POSTURES FOR LIVER QI

A detailed description of this sequence will be up soon! Thanks for your patience!

Yin for liver Qi
File Size:	3634 kb
File Type:	pdf

Download File

]]><![CDATA[How to use props in Yin yoga? Restorative versus yin yoga]]>Fri, 22 Apr 2016 12:47:00 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/props-in-yin

I was posting yet another Yin video on my YOGA ONLINE section and wanted to say a few word about when and why use props in a Yin practice, but then realized that it was going to be more that just a few words.
Since I teach both yin yoga and restorative yoga I often get a question about how are they different - as both are (very) slow and seem to require a wide arrangement of props. So I'll look at the two practices from the point of view of props:

An "official" definition of restorative yoga (by Judith Lasater) explains the connection of props and the practice as follows: "restorative yoga is the use of props to support the body in positions of comfort and ease to facilitate relaxation and health". Judith's interpretation of the Patanjali's Yoga Sutra describing asana sthiram sukham asanam is "abiding in ease in asana" (sthira often translated as steady, firm, stable also means unchanged, stillness, motionless; sukha translates to ease filled, comfortable). So by definition, our restorative yoga aims to take out the edge completely and rule out as much stimulation as possible so that our body and nervous system can relax completely. Any slight discomfort will jar the nervous system, which in turn will trigger the mind and we'll be on the roll again. Abundant use of props arranged diligently will put the body in shapes that will gently move the spine in different directions, creating space and opening in the body, while our energy cannot BUT withdraw inward, away from our senses to a state of Pratyahara. In this deep state of relaxation the restorative pose becomes a container where body starts to find it's balance, homeostasis and move towards wholeness. The primary aim of restorative yoga is REST and props are vital agents getting the body to that state of release and letting go.

In yin yoga we are actually working with that edge, we want a gentle stimulation of the deeper tissues of the body. Although many components of the two practices match - being still, staying in poses longer - the first tattva (principle) of the Yin practice is to come into a pose to an appropriate depth (edge) for your body. When coming into a pose, we move to a depth where we first feel resistance in the body, not pushing or striving yet exploring the edge with sensitivity and curiosity. The edge, by the way, can be physical, emotional and/or mental. But as we stay in poses longer, there WILL BE sensations arising. Our practice becomes about opening and being present in the body as our experience unfolds, shifts and changes, developing our capacity to notice and be with what is arising in our body, mind and heart.
In yin yoga the props will also support release and are especially useful/necessary for yogis who are relatively restricted in their movement. Even when I say we are looking for some stimulation for the tissues, we never aim for our maximum capacity or range of motion when we enter a pose. We come into the pose, find our edge, resolve to become still and then aim to relax and soften the muscles, so that the stretch can reach the deeper tissues of the body. More often than not, in order for the muscles to relax, release and soften, we will need to use support - under our knees to relax the thighs, under our seat to be able to tilt pelvis and round the spine safely, under the forehead to support neck.
But there is that ONE difference when using props in restorative and yin yoga - in yin the aim is not to take out sensation completely nor to force the body to pause and stay at that initial edge. You will find, that after a minute or two in the pose, body releases tension and softens, so you might be able to move deeper - not with force, but by responding to the natural opening in the body. That is one of the aims of the practice - to stay mindful of what is arising and then respond accordingly. Let me illustrate that with a butterfly series (hover over the picture with cursor to get to the story of each picture):

I start here with blocks unter my knees

Right away I feel too much of a pull on my neck, so I place a block under my forehead on its tallest end. My hips feel open, so I remove the blocks under thighs

About 2 minutes in, I felt completely at ease in the pose and I lowered the block to its next edge.

In another minute, I felt my head sinking heavily into the block, so I set it to it lowest edge and the body easily released even deeper into the pose

In short: in yin yoga keep using props, yet also keep checking in with the body, exploring your edge and certain discomfort (physical, mental, emotional) is built into the practice. In restorative yoga use props a lot, make comfort a priority number ONE, the aim here is not to stretch the body, but to keep releasing and relax in abiding ease!

Yin practices online

]]><![CDATA[WHY SLOW YOGA? ]]>Tue, 21 Jul 2015 12:17:28 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/why-slow-yoga

Why slow yoga?

Recently I find myself, more than ever before, explaining why I teach what I teach. Why slow yoga?
Maybe the lack of slow practice offered is a Berlin thing - a typical big city phenomenon when an overload of options, stimuli, experiences to consume, places to see and people to meet sends us spiraling off in thousand different directions (off our center). Or maybe it is my own evolutionary thing - my personal quest for ways to slow down cannot BUT reflect in my practice and in what I want to share with my community.

So not in my defense, but rather for clarity of intent, I thought to share the journey of my practice.
At different stages in our lives, different practices appeal to us. Also at different stages in our lives, different practices serve us best. What appeals to us and what serves us best, are not necessarily the same thing. I've been lucky to have great open-minded teachers to facilitate and guide my practice. But to be honest - mostly I bow down to grace - as when I have been ready, what no longer serves me, would become painfully visible and fall away on its own accord.

My first dips in the magic of the yoga pool were through Kundalini yoga. Mostly what it taught me, was to feel energy, to know ecstasy, to push my limits and to meet a challenge with willpower. I am not saying at all that this IS what Kundalini yoga teaches, I'm saying this is what I was able to receive at that point in my live. I practiced religiously twice a week for 6 years. I learned to love the chanting and without knowing anything about the philosophy behind this practice, I can safely say that this is where my seeking for meaning and truth started. (How I became a yogi).

Coming from a Kundalini yoga background, my first Vinyasa Yoga class was a bit of a shock to my system. I was puzzled, it was different, yet my body loved it! I was living, working and practicing in Syndey at that time - everything was new and I relished in discovering these new ways to move. My love affair with this moving flowing practice continues to this day. The dancer in me enjoys the fluidity and the endless creativity of a Vinyasa sequence which can feel like a full-body prayer in motion. My teacher training gave me the initiation, basic knowledge and tools how to keep digging deeper into the depths of the science and magic behind yoga. Some of this digging (un-earthing) has been through books, workshops, teachers, but a big part of it has been a continuos discovering through my own daily practice. (How I became a teacher)

Tapas would be the word to best describe this stage in my practice. I was hugely dedicated, fiercely focused and intensely committed to my athletic style of Vinyasa practice. Tapas comes from the Sanskrit verb "tap", which means "heat" or "to burn" and the traditional interpretation of tapas is exactly that - a fiery discipline to burn off the impediments that keep us from being in the true state of yoga (union with the universe). My practice was fiery all right - it felt exhilarating to see the changes in my body, to reach these new levels of strength and flexibility that I had never touched upon during the many years of Kundalini practice. I was on my mat 2 hours every morning and 2 hours every evening, sweating my way though vigorous flows, tackling head on and mastering one challenging pose after another. I kept going to new teachers, attending workshops and retreats, following the new trends, as a perfectionist I would from time to time step out of the flow and go to Iyengar yoga classes to become more meticulously correct in my alignment.

In the background of all this huffing-and-buffing would always be my meditation practice. By the time life had introduced me to Vinyasa yoga, I had already sat through two 10-day silent Vipassana meditation retreats and I had had my mini "ahaa" moments with revelatory glimpses to the cunning nature of my own mind. Yet it wasn't until the tapas of my practice had burned off some pretty thick layers of pride and egoic attachments to being an "advanced" yogi, that both my meditation and yoga practice (not to mention my life!!) would go through a severe transformation.

My nicely packaged world started to rip from the edges and crumble about 15 years into my yoga practice and 5 years into my teaching career. Fierce grace! I was lucky, I guess. For a lot of intense dedicated yogis, it takes an injury to drive in the true call, meaning, depth, possibilities, freedom of their practice. In my case, it was a 5 rhythms dance workshop that gave the first (deadly) blow to the world as I knew it. As I began to clearly see my fear of failure as my main striving force for success, ego as the string puller behind my spiritual quests and my deep sense of unworthiness masked as kindness and generosity, I had to stop. First right there on the dance floor, as I had no idea where the next step would come from…if not from fear, ego or an attempt to be accepted?!

The months after the workshop were like a free-fall. I seemed to have lost about 90% of my willpower. The fire had burnt out and like in life also in my practice I was completely lost. The old way of functioning - the discipline, the pushing, the dedication, the commitment - was no longer available. I found myself bouncing in a mixture of polarities: confusion enveloped with clarity, self embraced by no self, form as an embodiment of the formless, understanding eclipsed by the knowing, the doing witnessed by the being, the doing happening within the seeing...

Since then my practice has become less and less forced and it naturally slowed down. I gravitate towards the mindful passive holds of Yin yoga, the fully supported and nurturing shapes of Restorative yoga, the spaciousness and connectedness of meditation. I still love to flow through my Vinyasa practice from time to time, but more for the fun of it rather than to accomplish or pursue anything. The "drive" behind my practice is fueled from a different source. The ego has not been eradicated, don't get me wrong. But it has been exposed!

And this is where I teach from. I see the value of a fiery practice, but as I've witnessed my own ego so drawn to battle with difficulty, I try not to lead a practice that will feed pride and egoistic ideas of what it means to be an "advanced yogi". I see the value in consistency, striving towards your goals and getting on you mat every day, but I am adamant to guide your practice towards mindfulness, self-acceptance and compassion over mastering a difficult pose.

There is a time and place for everything. There is absolutely no wrong way for you to connect with yourself through yoga. I just urge you from time to time to check in with your true motives and intensions behind your actions (be it on or off the mat). Are you willing to be aware? Are you willing to be wrong? Are you willing to open the eyes to expose a fraud? Are you willing to see that you may not be living from a standpoint of truth? Are you willing to keep doing that over and over again?

My teaching cannot BUT reflect my own personal determination to slow down, to have my practice be something that restores balance and cultivates my ability to be with "what is" and to expose the the ways I'm still deceiving myself.

I do not consider myself less ignorant than most people. I have been and still am a seeker, but I have ceased to question stars and books; I have begun to listen to the teachings my blood whispers to me. My story is not a pleasant one; it is neither sweet nor harmonious, as invented stories are; it has the taste of nonsense and chaos, of madness and dreams — like the lives of all men who stop deceiving themselves.
Each man's life represents the road toward himself, and attempt at such a road, the intimation of a path. No man has ever been entirely and completely himself. Yet each one strives to become that — one in an awkward, the other in a more intelligent way, each as best he can.
(Hermann Hesse)

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]]><![CDATA[HOW I BECAME A TEACHER...]]>Mon, 30 Mar 2015 18:27:05 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/teacher

We don’t receive wisdom; we must discover it for ourselves after a journey that no one can take for us or spare us.

~ MARCEL PROUST

This is the last part of a trilogy where I'm looking into the synchronicity that has influenced and redirected my life and some major choices I've made. The first story is about me discovering yoga, the second one about me becoming the explorer of inner and outer landscapes and the final third one looks into the random circumstances that had to line up for me to become a teacher.

The inner voice "there has to be more to life" from story one combined with the glimpse and discovery of our inner world of being from story two, were the biggest factors leading me to take a sabbatical a few years after my attempt to climb Mount Kilimanjaro. It was an irrational and illogical decision on all accounts - I was 29 - most of my friends were having kids, buying apartments, settling down, getting married; I lived a very comfortable life with good income and excellent career prospects; I was surrounded by a loving family and awesome friends. Why rock the boat? There was no clear answer to that, but a sense of unexplained urgency that at one point crew so unbearable, that I was willing to lock eyes with my fear of losing what I had (or might have) and step into the void of not knowing what comes next.

Curiously (and realized only in hindsight) during the time between my inner turmoil with making the decision and actually leaving, the outer circumstances were lining up to support me in many ways. It was "boom" years in Estonia. Real estate prices skyrocketed, so I was able to sell my crapy first floor apartment for enough to pay back all my loans and have money in the bank. I was also working my ass off in the recruitment firm, as everyone was expanding and hiring and we were the best company in town for headhunting.

There is no hiding the fact, that having money in the bank makes it so much easier to make risky-looking decisions. I say risky-looking because to be honest and not to over-glorify my decision, there was no real risk! I was taking a sabbatical with a clause that I can come back any time I want and with a hint of potential partnership if I do decide to come back at the end of the year. I had the money to tie me over for that year and the worse thing that could happen would be me hating the whole endeavor and coming back in a few months and picking up where I left off.

My leaving initially had little to do with yoga or spirituality. There was an inner knowing, kind of a hunch, that this step is a start of a new era, but it was too daunting to even look further in that direction of thought, so I kept "selling" myself the idea that in a years time I will return to my life as I knew it.

My first stop was India, where I got my initiation and schooling into a life of a backpacker. The first few months did require some adjustment to attitudes, beliefs and habits, there was definitely frustration and fear, but all in all - I finally was in my element. I would say the most exhilarating aspect of those first traveller steps was my realization that I can totally re-invent myself. Or "undo" many of my limiting concepts of self. Whether it was the unfamiliar surroundings, the newness of each moment, the stream of new people that I would constantly meet or quite possibly the combination of it all, I found myself again and again stepping out of my habitual ways of behaving, my self-image started to shift, I became more outgoing, more daring, more trusting and a hell of a lot more spontaneous.

The framework of "this is my life" was no longer there, all bets were off and I was slowly but surely making friends with the unknown, learning to become more flexible, open minded and alert to synchronicities pointing the way. My theory is that we begin to open up to the "magic" of a spontaneous easy flow when our life-force and energy is no longer exclusively spent on cultivating and grooming our appearance in the eyes of others* in an attempt to reassure and validate our self-worth. I would step back into that trap soon enough, with a new identity of a "spiritual person" to build and up-hold, but during those first initial months the old was being stripped and cast away and the new had not arrived yet, so I was as "blank" as a 29-year old can be.

After about half a year backpacking through South East Asia (and about half way through my sabbatical year and my budget) a random chance landed me in Australia. It was never in my plans, but from my current latitude of 8 years into the future, I tell you with longing in my heart, that I often consider Australia my second homeland, a place of rebirth and huge transformation. Random chance, ey...?

It was while living in Sydney, that I picked up a regular practice of yoga again. I had decided to take a small break from the constant moving around and replenish my finances. I tried on my "old shoes again" - I got hired as a recruitment assistant by a small job agency, I rented a room overlooking the Rushcutters Bay, found a lovely yoga studio a few streets away at Potts Point and slipped back to 9-to-5. It was a life-stye I knew, with the perks of better weather and better pay, possibly bigger fish in the sea and more opportunities.

Two months into my new life in Sydney, the option of sponsorship was put on the table by my employer - a 2-year commitment to the firm would get me a permanent visa. It was an exciting concept to mull over, a completely new road opening up. With that decision baking in me, one morning I attended my usual yoga class. We had a substitute teacher and she taught an interesting mix of yoga and pilates. As I was chatting with the teacher after the class, she paused for a moment and passingly asked, if I had ever thought of becoming a teacher. BAM!!! My life was never the same again …

Another road came into view. A path I had never considered before, yet now I could not get that voice out of my head. Have you ever thought of becoming a teacher? I never had … but there it was now, following me everywhere. I spent the next few weeks in deep in doubt, indecision, confusion and in constant battle between reason and that strong pull I had felt before - the very same force that I felt in my first yoga class, the same determination that set me off on an impossible adventure to climb Mount Kilimanjaro and that same urgency I felt when I made my decision to take this sabbatical.

The poet John Keats wrote about Negative Capacity as a quality that goes to form a Man of Achievement and that is "when man is capable of being in uncertainties, Mysteries, doubts, without any irritable reaching after fact and reason".
I knew none of these concepts back then, but try as it might, the reason was losing ground. I started looking into teacher trainings, I found several trainings in Sydney that I could take over the weekends and still keep my road nr 2 (job plus permanent visa) open. Yet it seems it was not an half-hearted leap that was expected of me. You've done it before, you can do it again - the voice said. Over the last few months I had "fought back" some ground of familiarity, security, predicability and normalness, yet "this is not why you left home" was the knowing that was arising.

So - Byron Bay, a small alternative town on the east coast of Australia, and a 6-week intensive course it was...

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood and I -
took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference. (Robert Frost)

This decision DID make all the difference! This WAS a step towards a new era of consciousness unfolding. This WAS where all the previous decisions started making sense. This is a beginning of a journey of battle, discipline, struggle, doubt, of overcoming and betterment, that has, and still is, gradually ripening into a more nurturing, trusting and self-affirming way to respond to a Calling.

My direction in life had changed - the reference point more often than not is now inside. Suspending my own preconceived ideas and plans is not easy (and often I fail), yet I'm in awe at the synchronicity and divine order that keeps showing up and pointing the way, whenever I AM open, willing and receptive enough to see and hear and trust the moment-to-moment guidance.
Life is a free flowing, dynamic and creative process. The most important thing I've learned is to keep EXPERIMENTING, OBSERVING & PLAYING*

- Epilogue-
I stumbled upon Robert Frost, when I was fervently looking for the right words and closure to the trilogy. I read Road Not Taken and in such a simple way, it expressed it all. Thank you, I uttered!

The Road Not Taken (Robert Frost)

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

The took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves o step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood and I -
took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

PS!
I was given an amazing chance to say "Thank you" to that substitute teacher, who said the right words at a right time. I had been living and teaching in Byron Bay for a year, when my boyfriend's best friend from Sydney was coming over wanting us to meet his fiancé. The fiancé was HER:) … I recognized her at once when she got out of the car and exclaimed "You are the reason why I am here"…

* paraphrasing Jed Mckenna

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]]><![CDATA[HOW I BECAME A NOMAD AND A SEEKER ...]]>Tue, 03 Feb 2015 11:35:41 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/seeker-nomad

Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living.” ~ Miriam Beard

The nagging reminder: "there has to be more to life..." was always there like a subtle wake-up call. As I was re-evaluating my life and questioning the choices I was making, my focus was still very much turned outward. The only way I knew how to measure success, the level of happiness or being a good person, was in comparison to those around me and based on the criteria set by social standards. So I kept pursuing my career (to be successful), I kept my radar open for the perfect man (to make me happy) and was doing my best to please people (to be viewed as a good person).

In this outward search for fulfillment, I decided to widen my horizons. Obviously, I need to seek further, wider and higher, I gathered. So my quest for more meaning lead me to explore and journey the big-wide world. Kundalini yoga had taught me to challenge my comfort zone and showed me how willpower and perseverance can blast through the self-exposed limitations on how far we think we can go. 'No pain, no gain' attitude - remember?

I started to take little trips around Europe on my own. I was in my early 20s, I had never traveled on my own before, so my first trip to Amsterdam for a long weekend, flying solo, was scary as hell. When the plain took off form Tallinn airport, I was clenching the armrests thinking "what's wrong with me? Why can't I just use my spring holiday to clean the house and organize my closets, like normal people do."

Like in my yoga practice, I soon discovered that being out of my comfort zone is not scary, but exhilarating and fulfilling instead. It felt it's the unknown out there, that was beckoning me. So when my co-worker forwarded me an e-mail advertising a 2-week trip to Africa to climb mount Kilimanjaro, something in me stirred. I had to go. I had never traveled that far nor did I know anything about mountain climbing, yet it sounded hard and scary and definitely out of my comfort zone. It was also my first (and last) organized group travel with total strangers.

I borrowed the money for the trip from my father and most of the hiking gear from my friend's husband who is a climber. I was quite obsessed with the idea of reaching the top of the mountain. I was some-what aware of the difficulties and about the mountain sickness, yet I was determined and passionate about making it to the top. Because I knew it was going to be one of the hardest things I've ever done, I had this idea that when I reach the top, there would be some kind of an epiphany that would bring clarity to EVERYTHING. Literally - I was looking for a "higher" meaning - higher, as in 5895 meters.

Well … I wanted it to be hard and I got my wish. But as it often happens, not quite the way I had envisioned it. Before the climb, the group of us was taken on a safari at the bottom of the great mountain. I wore my open sandals for the safari and by the end of the first night my feet started to itch. I did not think too much of it, it just felt uncomfortable.

There are a few different routes to the top of Kilimanjaro. Our group was lead on a route called Marangu or sometimes also "Coca-cola", as it is the easiest (also shortest and cheapest) way to the top often taken by unprepared and inexperienced climbers. There are small dormitory huts on the route for accommodation and we had sherpas carrying out big bags for us.

When we started the climb my feet hurt a little and there was a small snakelike red line under the skin of one foot that seemed to inch longer by the hour. I was too fixated on making it to the top to let a little red line stop me. So, I put on my boots, told no-one about it and kept walking. The first day is an easy stroll, there's a need to acclimatize so the ascent initially is a leisurey walk in beautiful surroundings. When we reached the huts for the first night, my feet were swollen and blistered. Still blinded by my desire to reach some sort of illumination or salvation at the top, I kept silent and I kept walking.

When we reached the camp site at about 4000 meters, my feet looked black and blue, they were covered with blisters, the red line was getting longer and I was officially scared. There happened to be a doctor on the camp, a climber on her way down. When I showed her my feet, she looked me in the eyes and said: "The only way you are going is down". She did not know what it was, but she assured me that I was in serious risk of bacterial infection and that there was no way I could keep climbing.

You can see the snowy top from 4000 meters. It is where the alpine zone begins, so the conditions are harsher, it can still be very hot during the days but at nights the temperature drops below zero. It was the loneliest I had ever felt. My group kept moving on and I stayed on my own for a night at 4000 meters before starting my way down. I sat, I wept, I could not fathom that I was not able to push my way through this. I wanted to make it to the top more than anyone else in the group, there were people a lot weaker than me who were still climbing, and I had to stay behind and just stare are the Uhuru Peak from distance. I felt cheated, my heart was broken, I felt like a failure and mostly I just could not accept what had happened. You'd think I would be worried about that red line or my shattered feet, but mostly i felt devastated of being robed of the chance to get clarity. The illumination, the salvation, the epiphany - that was supposed to fix me.

On my way down first I was strapped on a stretcher in my sleeping bag unable to move, but after a 10 minute ride on narrow cliff path, I declined the transport and decided to walk. The doctor at the foot of the mountain was not of much help, but she did give me some anti-bacterial medicine. My flight back home was the next day and when I arrived in Tallinn I drove straight to the emergency room. I waited and waited, but when it was finally my turn, the the doctor looked at my feet, shrugged his shoulders and said, he has no idea what it is and just sent me home to have a rest.

Next morning in panic, I went to the Infectious Decease Hospital. Initially I got the same treatment, more compassionate than the day before, but still of no help. Luckily, one of the doctors there had worked in Africa, so when he saw my feet, he exclaimed a name in latin (cutaneous larvae migraines) and called in some of his students to see a perfect case of "creeping eruption". It's a human infection with dog or cat hookworm larvae. It would heal on its own over the course of few weeks or months, but in my case it got irritated and infected by my climbing agenda.

I was checked into the hospital right away and ordered to bed-rest for a week.
And now (finally?!) we get to the zest of the tale. As I lay in my hospital bed, a good friend of mine came for a visit and dropped a book at my bedside table. In the evening staring at the salad-green walls of my room and feeling extremely bored, frustrated about missing more work and still grieving over my failed adventure, I picked up the book. It was Eckart Tolle's "Power of now". I inhaled it in one reading, I did not sleep a wink that night, just kept reading and reading, the words resonating and landing on a soil that was thirsty and ready. It was my first "spiritual" book that opened an inner world that I had sometimes felt, but never knew in terms of words or concepts.

Though I had practiced yoga for a few years by then, this was my first real pointer from the outer to the inner. Or maybe I was finally ready to hear it. I have to admire the circumstances - me needing to travel across the world, to have my dream shattered, to feel utterly lonely and defeated, in order to land in that salad-green hospital room with exactly the message I needed to hear. "Life will give you whatever experience is most helpful for the evolution of your consciousness."says Eckart Tolle. I wanted it hard and painful, and oh boy, did I get my wish. I wanted an epiphany, and I got it - not on the top of Uhuru, but in a hospital bed. I was so fixated on something out there being the key to my happiness, in that hospital bed it was the first time I felt the into the meaning of "life happening NOW", the "joy of just BEING".

I floated in that newly discovered bubble of inner peace, calm, understanding, appreciation and joy for a few weeks to come. Like in my first yoga class when a seed got planted, then watered and nurtured though years of practice, I recon this is when a new direction in my life took up strong roots. It wasn't only the unknown out there, that was beckoning me. It was the uncharted inner landscapes of who I really am, that yearned to be explored.

Of course, this was just a beginning of a journey - both outer and inner. I had had a glimpse of freedom, a way out of bondage and suffering. Since then, I've sentenced myself back in that self-imposed prison ruled by fears, beliefs, ego, insecurities and loss of faith countless of times. As I kept discovering new contents, countries, cultures, people, founding new relations, ties and tribes in different corners of the world, I also kept up the "inner work" of questioning all I knew myself to be. The game was ON and I knew it was only the Truth that would set me free. Truth - as truth behind reality. Truth not only as some kind of spiritual experience but a revolution in a way life can be lived.

...At each moment, whether we realize it or not, we are making a choice of whether we are thinking and acting from the completeness of spirit or the brokenness of ego. And it is by taking responsibility for this choice that freedom becomes accessible at each and every moment, and new and creative possibilities flow into consciousness as formerly unknown insights. But we must be willing to choose the open heart and open mind of spirit over the assumed rightness of the egoic viewpoint. (Adyashanti).

...TO BE CONTINUED

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]]><![CDATA[HOW I BECAME A YOGI ... ]]>Mon, 19 Jan 2015 14:00:52 GMThttps://www.liinayoga.com/blog/yogi

Writing is easy. You just sit down and bleed (Hemingway).
I ran across this quote, when for the hundredth time I was hushing down a voice that from time to time urges me to do just that - sit down and write (read bleed). In some bizarre way, the acknowledgment that there is some shared sense of suffering, anguish and release in the process of writing gave me the last push.

Where-else to start than from the beginning?
It is hard to locate the beginning tough, isn't it? How come I ended up where I am today, how far back can I trace the co-incidences, the little meetings, decisions, turning-points that have lead me to this very point in time and space. As if trying to trace the beginning of a single wave in the ocean, when we step back far enough, broaden our perspective, we realize "the beginnings and endings are not known to us, only patterns. That wave began where the universe began and ends where the universe ends (Jed McKenna).

Yet bear with me. I'll bring you 3 stories that describe how in my journey the pattern has formed and shaped my life into what it is today. I wonder often about co-incidence, fate, free will versus destiny. I don't attempt to provide an answer, but I open the dialogue and throw out the questions.

Story number ONE
How I became a yogi and a seeker...

I was in my early 20s, living a "work hard, play hard" lifestyle in Estonia. I was working as a junior consultant in a recruitment company. I was a few years out of university, determined to be the best version of me which I knew could be achieved with hard work and dedication. I had been a straight A student throughout high-school and university, I knew how to push myself, I was a perfectionist and my own worse critic.

One day a friend of mine asked me a favor - she wanted me to join her at a yoga class at a local gym. The story goes: she had found out that a guy she had a crush on was attending that class and of course that was the reason for her sudden interest in taking up yoga. And of course she could not go alone?! I was reluctant at first, as I remembered the one and only yoga class I had attended years before, where the teacher asked us to open up like a flower which sounded like utter nonsense to me. Eventually I agreed and the door to a new way of living and seeing the world just cracked open.

There were no yoga studios in Estonia back then. No incense smells, no soft Tibetan bowl music. The mirrors and windows of the gym's aerobics room were still steamy from the class before, the pumping music and the clinks and grunts from the weightlifting echoed in from next door. It happened to be Kundalini yoga, not that I knew about any other styles or classifications back then. I remember looking around wearily during the repetitious exercises and the chanting of my first class there, it was the strangest form of exercise I had ever done. And it was surprisingly hard, no flowers opening, the teaches seemed very "human" and "normal" and the main thing - I felt amazing afterwards. After the first class I was hooked! My friend came a few times, the guy she had a crush on kept coming now and then for a few years. I kept coming almost religiously twice a week for the next 5 years.

The inner and outer conditions, the circumstances of my life, the degree of my openness and receptivity and what was offered by my first teacher matched. Anything too dogmatic would have left me running for the hills - all I knew was that I had a stupid grin on my face when I drove home from yoga, feeling happy for no apparent reason every time after I practiced. That kept me coming back. That was enough back then.

As my life kept getting messier over those 5 years - a break up from a long-term relationship; promotion at work that lead to longer hours, more self-doubt and self-ciritism; an eating disorder as a way to seize control; lots of drinking and partying as an attempt to avoid feeling the emptiness that hollowed at the very core of my being; riding the roller-coster of burn-out and depression. I was self-destructing, outwardly successful, inwardly withering away.

My soil wasn't ripe for the real depths of yoga, yet the field got blowed and harvest of the fruits would come, even if it was many years later. My attitude in life was "no pain, no gain", that is what I applied at work, that is I how I lived my private life and that was also what I applied in my practice. I loved the challenge of Kundalini yoga, the constant test of my limits and going physically beyond what I thought was possible.

Yet the seeds got planted. Showing up for practice, whatever my motivations were in those days, and touching that sense of ease and contentment at the end of the practice that was very foreign to me in other areas of life, sprouted questions and feelings that I had not asked or felt before. A felt sense, that "there has to be more to life than meets the eye", became my constant companion. For the first time I started to question the authenticity of the choices I was making and the "life template" I had been following: good education (check), make a career (I was on my up); future held: getting married, building a house, having kids, 2 cars, a holiday house and vacations to exotic hotspots.

There was a new sense awakened within me, it wasn't the familiar judgmental condecending voice of the critic, it wasn't the confused and conficting mind-chatter arising from the ego as it strived to feel safe, in charge and in control of life. It was gentle, subtle, wordless guidance that I have learned to listen, expect, trust and follow over the years.
Slowly but surely this quiet inner tone started to guide me to pay attention to the deeper meaning of life. To ask the right questions, to wait for the answers in the gut and to follow the voice of intuition even against logic and rational mind.

In hindsight, I believe that it was my yoga that over time freed me up to tap into this subtle guidance that is always available and present to point us in the direction of life lived and embraced fully from the heart. The apparent co-incidences that form the chain of events guiding our lives trace back way beyond my friend asking me to tag along as she was following her own heart's agenda (which did not end up bearing fruit, by the way). We inhabit a planet that was situated just the right distance from the sun, having just the right temperatures for life to evolve, the universe keeps expanding in just the right rate for the galaxies and stars to form. Is it all pure chance, accidental, co-incidence?

As you sever attachment and stop squandering your emotional energy, your perspective broadens and you come to see larger and larger patterns at work, patterns within patterns, your own patterns swirling in among them, in no way separate or apart, in no way greater or lesser" (Jed McKenna).

...TO BE CONTINUED

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EMBODIMENT OF WATER ELEMENT through
the sinew and primary channels of Chinese medicine

FASCIA ANATOMY
where ancient wisdom meets modern understanding of the body

A SAMPLE SEQUENCE FOR WATER ELEMENT

EMBODIMENT OF METAL ELEMENT through
the sinew and primary channels of Chinese medicine

FASCIA ANATOMY
where ancient wisdom meets modern understanding of the body

MYOFASCIAL LINES:
DEEP FRONT ARM LINE & SUPERFICIAL FRONT ARM LINE

UPPER BODY YIN POSES
that will target the Lung and Large intestine channels